The AmeriBurger Chronicles 1 and A
by Aquailita
Summary: Rated T for select Amercia curses. England is hanging out at America's house when America offers him a burger. Then England somehow gets ahold of some beer. The events to follow are unusual, random, and confusing. But is he now drunk, or simply insane? And then some antics occur between Canada and Russia. And possibly Kuma. Can you say "awkward"? Parts 1 and A in a possible series.
1. The Roleplay AKA Part 1

**This is based on a roleplay between me and TTFF (TimeTheFinalFrontier). The title was her idea. I was America and she was everyone else (up until part A, which is mine alone). If you have a problem with any character, go to that respective person. The roleplay is part 1, the rest is part A. This chapter is part 1.**

**_!~IMPORTANT NOTE~!_**

**I'm just replacing all of the roleplay chapters with this one single chapter.  
****Also, I've gotten 2 (I think) anonymous reviewers who have been hate-spamming this with hate-flame-reviews. I deleted the most offensive and stupid ones (meaning the ones that say 'fuck you' or 'die' or are just random 'this is crap' and not a chapter review). GTFO I say to those people. This is part, part 1, is the roleplay part. It probably will be OOC and random, so shut up. I'm still continuing with the A part (after this chapter) even if those two people who wasted their time to review a story and chapters they didn't like based on a roleplay they didn't like don't care or want it. But I don't deny that this is a lot of OOC crapshit. It's supposed to be entertaining, not realistic.  
****Thank you for your time. **

**Since this is an update, I will put my standard AN closing:**

**R&R**

**ENJOY~!**

* * *

"HEY ENGLAND!" America shouts.

England scowls. "Hello, America. There's no need to shout. I'm right next to you."

America laughs, slamming his hand onto England's back. "Let's get a break from that terrible food and go get some burgers with me!"

England crosses his arms and turns away from America, who smiles and wanders away. "I refuse to consume those greasy heart-attacks you like to call food." America reappears behind England with a hamburger in each hand. England spins to face him. "And my cooking is not terrible, you git face!"

"Too late," America laughs, waving a burger in England's face and taking a bite of his own. "My food is the best," he mumbles through a mouthful of burger.

England pouts, swatting at the burger. "I'm never staying with you again, America! You make me eat hamburgers and make fun of my cooking! I'm going back to England!"

America stills the burger. "Aw, don't be like that! Just try a burger, please," America whines.

"I am not going within ten meters of that greasy rubbish!"

America sighs. "Fine, no hamburgers..."

England raises an eyebrow hesitantly. "Well, tha-"

America cuts England off. "We'll have cheeseburgers instead!"

"America, you wanker!"

America laughs and produces a plate of ten cheeseburgers.

England huffs and turns around. "I'm leaving! I'm booking a flight out of your pitiful excuse of a country right now!"

America holds onto one of his shoulders as he begins to walk away. "No, wait, please," he begs and puts the plate down on the kitchen table. "Let's make a deal! Eat half of a burger and I'll have some of your... Your... Your stuff when I go to your place!"

"It's not 'stuff', America, it's beef stew! Beef! Stew! And I might consider it if you stop butchering my language!"

"Well, sorry," America drawls. "And how am a butchering your language?" America takes a cheeseburger and proceeds to stuff it into his mouth.

"I don't know what you're speaking, but it's not the Queen's English!" England sniffs.

America has finished three burgers in the time England's been speaking and smirks. "Well, I don't live under your Queen!"

England rolls his eyes. "America, at least close your mouth if you're going to insist on swallowing with chewing." He watches America eat for a moment before continuing. "And whose fault is that? You'd have grown up into a perfect gentleman if you'd not insisted on declaring your bloody independence!" He turns away, pouting.

"Mmm, m're mst mlmush," America says through a mouthful of food, chewing loudly. "And, hey, your rules are crazy! Wanted some space, you know? Is leaving illegal or something? No, don't think so!" America laughs.

England pouts harder. "America, you wanker. You and your bloody Revolution."

"Cuz we're independent!" As he talks, a bit of food flies out of his mouth. America takes another burger.

"America! Will you stop eating for a minute and listen to me!"

"And stop that pouting," America orders, poking England's face. "I have ears and a mouth, you know."

England swats America's hand away. "Don't touch me, you wanker!"

"If a hero can't multitask, what can he do," America continues, oblivious.

England pouts even harder, bottom lip quivering. "If you were such a hero, you'd never have left me!"

"What? What does being a hero have to do with it? I became a hero because I left! You were holdin' me back, man!"

England bursts into tears. "S-stupid A-America."

America's expression softens. "Aw, man, don't cry! You'll ruin the atmosphere... And your mood."

"How do you know about the atmosphere, you idiot?"

"Because..."

"You couldn't read the atmosphere if your life depended on it, you wanker!"

"Heroes can fly," America explains, striking a hero pose before returning to his normal stance. "All right, man, calm down. And remind me never to offer you anything that has the word burger in it."

"I don't want your greasy heart-attacks," England shouts, his eyes beginning to glow. He laughs evilly, regressing to pirate mode. "I'm the British bloody Empire and the British Empire doesn't eat your stupid American burgers!"

"Fine, dude, calm down," America says, stepping back. "And you say I'm the loud one," he mutters.

"I'll show you and your upstart colonies the wrath of the British Empire! You'll beg to join the Empire again! You all will!"

America starts shaking, eyes wide. England begins to glow green and starts muttering spells.

"Dude, run, England's going crazy," America shouts to no one in particular.

* * *

England shoots a bolt of magic at America, who shrinks into Chibi-America. England laughs darkly and kneels down. "Come here, little America."

America tries to hide behind the fallen burger pile but finds himself to be too large and instead faces England, chest puffed out. "Hey! What the hell! Damn it, what did you do? Oh, crap..."

"Bad America! Do I have to wash your mouth out with soap?" England picks up the burger plate and places it on the counter.

"Fuck, I can't reach my burgers!"

"Watch your language, boy!" Little America starts to sniffle loudly. England smiles down at him. "I'll give you a burger if you're a good boy and become part of my Empire once more." America looks up at him confusedly, crying softly. "Don't cry, America. Big brother England is here."

"T-there are b-burgers in the Empire?" America asks, sniffling.

"There are burgers in the Empire, yes," England assures his charge. America looks at him skeptically and England laughs evilly. "All the burgers you want!" America is silent and England scowls. "Say yes or face the wrath of the mightiest empire ever to have lived!"

America bursts into tears. "Why are you being so mean and scary?" He attempts to run away but bumps into the table and falls.

England smirks and begins to mutter spells once more, summoning the devil. Russia appears and he curses lowly. America screams.

"Become one with Russia, da?"

England smiles. "It's me or him, little America."

"N-n-no," America stutters, curling into a ball on the floor. "I-I-I..."

"Big brother England will give you scones and beef stew if you're join the British Empire."

"No! I want to be my own country! Help!" America whimpers.

"Big, scary, evil Russia will make you work and torture you."

"Noooooo!"

* * *

"America, you wanker, it's your bloody fault I lost my Empire," he sobs.

"Dude, what the hell was that," America asks in a loud voice, looking around frantically.

England cries harder at America's tone. "America, stop shouting at me!" England sniffs and looks around. "Do you happen to have any liquor, America?"

America's eyes widen as England stumbles into the kitchen. "No I don't," he shouts unconvincingly.

England shouts triumphantly as he pulls out a six-pack of beer. "Liar," he says as he drinks the first can and takes a second one from the pack.

America takes the rest of the pack from England's arms. "Tell me what the hell you just did back there!"

England starts to sway, smiling drunkenly. He begins to sing in an off-key voice. "Gooooodddddd saveeee the queeeee~eeennn."

"What idiot put a six-pack of beer in my fridge," America wonders to himself.

England notices America's momentary confusion and takes the opportunity to steal a third can of beer, finishing off the second.

"Hey," America shouts, slashing open the remaining three cans and pouring them down the sink.

"It was probably what's-his-name with the bear," England says in response to America's question. "You know, that invisible guy up North?"

"Yo! Bro, did you buy these beers?" America shouts to thin air.

"Hey, maybe he'll want to become part of my Empire again," England muses. "If only I could remember his name..."

America continues talking to the air. "You knew England was coming! England plus beers equal drunk, bro!"

"America, what's your brother's name?" England slurs.

"Uh, Canada," America says, laughing. England pulls out a cellphone and dials Canada's number. "You people have terrible memories. Hey, who are you calling?"

The phone rings once in the other room before stopping. "C-Canada?" England says into the phone.

Canada's voice can be heard from the other end of the phone. "Eh?"

America raises an eyebrow. "Hey, wait, how did you get his number?"

England smiles at Canada's voice. "Canada! Boy, how do you fancy becoming part of the British Empire again?" He pulls the phone away from his ear for a moment and realizing that it's America's, shrugs.

"D-did Alfie put you up to this?" Canada asks hesitantly.

"No, boy, your brother had nothing to do with this!"

"England, I'm already part of your Commonwealth. Your Queen is on all of my money. What more do you want?"

"Dude, why are you talking to each other on the phone?" America's eyes widen as he realizes England is using his phone. "Dude, give me my phone back!" America grabs the phone away from England.

"America, give it back! I was talking to what-is-his-name!"

"He's in the nex- Uh, never mind."

England pouts and walks into the living room. Canada is lying on the couch, drinking from a bottle of maple syrup. England smiles.

"Canada, my boy, how do you fancy becoming part of the British Empire!"

"Al, deal with him!"

America takes a burger and creeps up behind England, motioning for Canada to be quiet. Smiling, he stuffs the burger into England's mouth. "Ha! The hero strikes again!"

"Arg! Alfred!" England shouts through his mouthful of burger before he manages to spit it out over Canada. "America, you wanker!"

Canada looks at America disapprovingly and starts cursing in French.

"Sorry, dude," America says sheepishly.

England screams as Canada curses particularly loudly, brushing burger bits from his hair. "The frog taught you that language, didn't he?"

America peeks over England's shoulder. "Canada, you might want to start thinking about running away."

"Stupid French frogs," England rants, pouting as he sees Canada slipping from the room. "Canada! Come back! You need to rejoin my Empire!" England attempts to run after Canada but America blocks his way.

"Dude. You're still drunk. Sit down."

"America," England whines.

"No," America insists.

"I might be drunk, but, but, what did old Winston say?"

America's brow furrows in concentration. "I like burgers?"

"You'll still be beautiful in the morning, that's what!"

"Aw," America coos. In his mind, he thinks to himself, but you never are.

"America, I'm tired..."

"Sit," America urges.

"No, America, let go of me! I need to rebuild my Empire!

"No! Go build it out of... Uh... What's that brick-like food you like again?"

England starts to glow again and regresses back to the 1700's. "Would you like some scones, America! I'm in the mood to bake scones!"

"Yes, I would like one."

"R-really?" England looks up painfully hopefully. "I thought you h-hated my cooking?"

"No, dude, you're drunk!" America sighs and shakes England's shoulders. "Snap out of it!"

"Oh, America, Come into the kitchen with me, I'll make you all the scones you want," England gushes, oblivious to America's last words. Fireworks go off in the distance and England bursts into tears. America is confused. "You and your stupid Revolution, ruining everything!"

"What the hell? All I did was offer you a burger and now you're drunk and going on and on about the Revolution! Dude, get over it!"

England falls into America.

"Nothing's going to change it," America continues, looking down at England when the smaller nation falls into him.

"America, you idiot, stop falling into me!"

"You're the one who fell," America insists, carrying England to the couch and laying him down none too gently.

"N-no, you were!" England says, pouting.

"No. You!" America says loudly, pushing England down when the smaller nation attempts to sit up and stepping away when he finishes.

"America! D-don't leave m-me!" England wails, crying harder.

"Dude, I'm still here. I won't leave you."

"A-America!"

"Right here." England looks up at America tearfully and the superpower stares back, shifting uncomfortably. "You OK?" America asks softly.

England shakes his head. "A-America," he stutters, blushing.

"You want a burg- I mean, do you need a hug?" America asks, leaning down to hug the smaller country as England nods.

England pushes America away after a moment and the superpower pats his back. England scowls, recovering slightly. "America, you idiot! The world is in this mess because of you!"

"Well, that was nice while it lasted," America mutters. "Nah, man, the hero helps the world! I made it better!"

"And everyone blames me because you didn't allow me to raise you the right way, as if it were my fault that you were an insolent little child!" England continues, scowling.

"What?" America asks, confused. "Dude, so not true!"

England notices Russia standing in the corner. "Say, Russia, would you say that America has made the world a better place or completely ruined it for the rest of us?"

"What? Russia, you're still here?"

"Kol, kol, kol," Russia mumbles.

"Ah, crap," America says, face-palming.

"America, you will become one with Russia, da, and then we can ruin the world together!"

"Why are you still in my house?" America whines.

"See, even Russia thinks you're a wanker, America," England laughs, checking his watch. His smile falls as he sees the time. "America, you fool, you need to drive me to the airport!"

"Oh... Uh..."

"My flight leaves in less than an hour!"

America shrugs and looks at Russia, wondering when he will leave. England gets mad and slaps America lightly.

"What, dude? It's your fault for gettin' drunk! Can you even standup to get to the car!"

"Well, it's your bloody fault for making me book a flight back to England! And of course I can stand," he says, attempting to rise and promptly falling into America. "America, you fool, stop falling into people!"

"Told ya you couldn't stand," America mumbles.

"Your gravity is rubbish because you drive on the wrong side of the bloody road, you git.

"No. We drive on the right side of the road."

"Also known as the wrong bloody side!"

"Hey, you were the one that fell. Not me."

"I did no such thing!" England laughs evilly. "Canada!" He calls into the next room.

"Oh crap," America mutters.

"Canada, your brother insulted your hockey team~! And he said that maple syrup was rubbish and that your bear isn't real!" England snickers as America attempts to pick him up , runs to the door, opens it, and drops England in the process. Canada appears, becoming visible as he gets madder.

America holds up his hands in surrender. "Bro, you know I would never say that!"

Canada snarls and starts a three-hour rant about America's shortcomings. England laughs as America winces. "Calm down," America orders both Canada and England.

"Russia," England calls. "Russia, America said that you were a fat commie!"

"Shut up, England," America shouts as Russia appears in his vision, dark aura gathering around him. "I never said that! Shit!"

"And he made fun of your relationship with Lithuania!" England continues as America tries to drag him away. "And he said you sister Ukraine was an idiot!" He laughs as America tries to push him off porch. "And he told Belarus where you are!"

"Shut, up, dude," America screams as Russia pulls a pipe out of nowhere, giving up on trying to remove England and drops him on the floor once more. "Calm the hell down! He's drunk and he doesn't know what he's talking about! Why are you people believing him? Both of you were here the whole time and I didn't say those things."

"See? They hate you too much to take your word for it!" England says.

"Kol, kol, kol," Russia gleefully agrees.

"Hate you, England," America mutters.

England starts to cry again. "I h-hate you too!"

* * *

America succeeds in getting England fully out of the house and closes the door behind them.

"Stupid America!" England whines. America throws him on the grass and England screams. "Ow, America, you idiot!"

"How does that hurt? That grass is soft as shit. Fail." America rolls his eyes as he succeeds in dragging England to the car and opens the car door.

England shows America his scraped knees and reverts back to 11thCenturyEngland. "What is this metal horse doing here?"

"Get in the damned car," America sighs. "It's not my fault that you got hurt. You're the one who got drunk. Oh, not again," America huffs, finally taking note of England's sudden change.

"France!" England screams. "This is your fault! Again!" He looks at America confusedly. "Who are you?" He asks, drawing his sword.

"Shit," America mutters.

"You trespasser!"

"England, it's me, America," America shouts.

"You'll be executed!"

"Calm down! I'm America, remember?"

"I don't know any America's! Who are you, you wretch!"

America eyes the sword confusedly. "Get in the car man," he shouts.

"Franceeeeeee," England calls. America rolls his eyes, getting into the car to see if England follows. "Francey pants, get over here! I know you can hear me in that wretched frog-infested country of yours!" America stares at England disbelievingly. "The only thing between us is the English Channel, I know you can hear me! Franceeeeeeeee!"

America gets out of the car, walks up to England, and proceeds to slap him once. England brings a hand to his cheek tenderly, reverting back to his normal self. "Ow, America, you git! What was that for?" He asks, eyes swimming with tears.

"You're drunk. Get in the car."

"No! I refuse!"

"Your plane?"

"My plane? What plane?"

"The one back home?"

England blinks, confused. He smiles brightly and falls into America. "I want to say here with you forever, America~"

"Maybe I slapped you a little too hard," America muses quietly.

* * *

Recovering quickly, England stands and brushes away imaginary dust. "America, you git, what are we doing standing about? I have a plane to catch!" America shrugs, getting into the car. England follows reluctantly. "Say, America, this death trap of yours, when did you last get it cleaned?"

America starts driving and looks over at England briefly. "Last week?"

England runs his finger through an inch-thick layer of burger grease and wipes it on America's shirt. "This is not a week's worth of burgers! Even for you!"

"Or is it?" America laughs at the way England's face contorts at those words.

England pokes America's belly. "America, you fat pig! Stop eating so many bloody burgers!"

"Dude, don't touch the hero! If I can't touch you, you don't poke the hero." America gently moves England's hand away, trying not to cause another change of character.

"W-why not? Aren't I s-special enough?" England bursts into tears.

America, who has grown used to England's crying phases, pats the smaller nation on the head. England falls into America's shoulder, sobbing, and America sighs. "Calm down."

"A-Americaaaaa!"

"Dude, I'm driving! Don't lean on me!"

"I don't care! I'll do whatever I please! I'm the British bloody Empire!"

"This is my car. My place. My rules. My airport to get you back home!"

"Mine," England pouts. "Mine! You were my colony! You still are! My America!"

"Well this is my land," America protests weakly.

"No! It's mine! You're mine!"

America tries to shove England off of him but fails. The car swerves and America quickly presses auto drive.

"America, watch where you're going!" England fails and hits the play button on the radio accidentally. Bad Romance starts playing and England reverts back to a childish Albion-state but somehow remembers America.

America finally succeeds in pushing England off of him and grabs the wheel again, turning off auto drive and the horrible song.

"Don't push me, you meanie!" England pouts. "America, where am I?"

America spares a glance at England, expression soften as he take sin the childish look on England's features. "Shush," he whispers softly. "You're in a car."

"W-what's a car?"

"A car is a thing that drives places. We're in a car," America says softly.

"W-what's drive? I don't wanna drive, it sounds scary." America doesn't answer for a moment and England panics. "A-America? I'm s-scared. We're in a metal box! And we're going really f-fast!"

"No, it's not a box. It's a car. And, yes, cars go fast."

"Is it a type of horsie?"

America slows the car. "Yes, but it runs on gas. And it's not alive."

"W-what's g-gas?"

"It's stuff that makes cars go."

"America, you're talking funny."

"Gas is for cars like food is for people," America continues, choosing to ignore England's previous statement.

"So, like grass? For the horsie?"

"No. Like gas and oil."

"But the horsie will be hungry!" England sobs.

"Shush," America whispers as England starts to cry.

"I don't want the horsie to be hungry!"

"Go to sleep. The horse won't be hungry."

"Y-yes it will! It n-needs g-grass!"

"This isn't a horse," America sighs, losing patience.

England starts to cry harder. "I want a horsie!"

"It's a car," America shouts.

"I want a horsie, America," England insists, equally loud.

"Go to sleep a dream about horses," America says, silently willing England to shut up.

"But I want a horsie!"

America sighs and slams his head against the driving wheel repeatedly.

* * *

After a long half an hour of England begging for a horsie, they arrive at the airport. England is still in Albion-mode.

"America, where are we?"

"At an airport."

"Why are they shiny birds all over the place? It's so noisy here!"

"There are planes."

"What's an airport? What are planes?"

"They're like cars, but bigger and they fly."

"America, I'm scared! Don't make me leave! I don't wanna go on the flying horsies."

"No, I'm goin' with you," America sighs, wishing he didn't have to. But he is now worried about England doing something stupid on the plane or maybe even missing his plane.

"R-really? It'll be all right if you're with me, America," England says happily, clinging to America's arm.

"You're too drunk to fly alone," America mumbles. America wonders if England really is still drunk, if he felt like this all the time, or if England was simply an unstable person on the inside.

England reverts back to his normal self. "What did you say, you wanker?" America looks down at England, who had made his way into his lap. "I'm not drunk," England insists.

"Yes you are," America says, lifting England off of his lap and depositing him on the passenger seat. "We're here, by the way."

"Well, I might be drunk, but you're... You're America! And Americans are stupid and fat!" England laughs evilly. "And! And! Russia is at your house and Canada is mad at you. So, ha!"

America shrugs, and hiding his fear that Russia might not decide to leave when he got back, began leaving the car and locking the doors.

England sits back in his seat, remembering the last few moments. "America, you wanker! You are not coming with me! I can't deal with you for another eight hours!" He shouts, hoping America will hear him outside the car.

America laughs, watching England's mouth moving but not hearing a sound over the noises of the airport.

England sees America laugh and pouts. He smiles evilly as an idea strikes him and takes out America's cell-phone, starting to call every country in the world that hates America.

America watches England fumbling with a phone and wonders if he should let him out of the car. He debates this for a moment before realizing the damage England could do with a cell-phone and grabs the door, almost tearing it off the hinges in his haste to open it. "No," America shouts, grabbing his phone and checking the call log to see that England has already called China, France, Germany, Poland, and Estonia.

England laughs evilly and pulls out his own cell-phone, quickly dialing the rest of Europe. America groans and calls everyone in his contacts list, shouting, "Disregard that, England was drunk," before hanging up abruptly.

England laughs. "They hate you too much to listen," England says, proceeding to continue a rant to Luxemburg about how horrible America is.

"America pulls England out of the car, smashing his phone on the pavement below. England runs away quickly, laughing madly behind him.

"Hey, England," America calls, turning around just in time to see the older nation streaking across the airfield, hopping into the cockpit of a British Airways plane, and taking off across the lawn.

America stands and stares at the last spot he was England at, mouth opened wide.

* * *

"Well, that could've gone worse," America muses, getting into the driver's seat and pulling out his cellphone. Going through the contacts, he silently wonders who wasn't in Europe and smiles brightly when he comes across Japan's name.

Dialing quickly, America shouts into the phone, "Hey, Japan, mind if I crash at your place for a few years? England just sent half of Eurasia on my tail and Canada really didn't need another reason to hate me. Hahaha!" Hearing Japan make a sound on the other end that doesn't sound angry, America doesn't wait for an answer before striking a hero pose and shouting, "'Kay, great. Imma catch the next flight to your house. See ya soon!"

At that moment, he remembers the fallen plate of burgers at home. He tries to remember what happened to it and doesn't recall anyone picking it up.

"Aw, crap my burgers!"

Back at America's house, things are getting strange.


	2. Meanwhile

**This is going to be a "meanwhile" chapter for what was going on at the house after America and England left the house. This includes everything from the grass incident(actually its more of a grass** _**fail**_**)**** to the point right before the phone call to Japan. Since this is a "meanwhile" chapter, I think it would make sense to use past tense. But I feel more comfortable using the present tense since it's what we've been doing the whole time. Let me know if you want me to change it, though.**

**Again, this part isn't the roleplay anymore, it's all mine. **

**As I will state in the next chapter, there is no RussiaxCanada stuff. But if you havent already figured it out, there was some slight USUK (very _sliiiiiightly_ onesided on America's part (because I was America and I wasn't being romantic with him, just caring)) in the previous chapters. **

**Anyway, ENJOY! and stuff like that.**

* * *

_Meanwhile, back at America's house._

* * *

The door closes behind the two arguing nations. Canada is still standing in the hallway looking at the door. When it clicks shut, he stops muttering about his brother's hateful comments and shortcommings. He had already cleaned the burger bits off of himself, but still had a bit on him. He was mad that Alfred had done something so stupid as stuff a burger down someone's mouth, but starts to feel as if he should also a bit cross at the one who had spit it out on him.

It seems like there is still a bit of bread on Canada, because the bear he has been holding the whole time sees it on his neck. Adorable Kumajiro twists his head around a bit and licks it off. He somehow tastes a bit of Engand's spit on it and shudders a bit and makes a face after swallowing.

The motion of the bear in his arms reminds Canada that he was still there.

"Come on, Kumagyro," he says in an angered tone. "Let's go back to our room." For some reason, he takes the one beer America and Englad had managed to miss with him.

"Who are you?" the polar bear asks.

"I'm Canada."

* * *

Still standing in the corner holding his pipe, Russia watches the whole short scene and and Kolkolkol's as Canada walks away.

* * *

**If you hadn't noticed, Canada refers to America as Alfred and America refers to Canada as Matthew. It was TimeTheFinalFrontier's idea to have them call each other that since they are brothers and more familiar with each other than the others are.**

**ANYWAY! So this is my first story and stuff so I appreciate any reiveiws and favorites. But if not, I can always blame TTFF for my lack of fame cuz the first chapters are me and her. If you've managed to stay interested long enough to see this chapter, which is soley my work, then I thank you.**

**Anyway (I say that alot, don't I?), review and stuff and whatever and I'll also be posting the chapter after the one after this one (I forget the number) in which features a certian Russian just gave it away and a certian bear. **

**Hehehe...**


	3. Thinking About Things

**So at this point in the "Meanwhile" chapters, Canada is in his room. At the same time outside of the house, America has managed to get England in the car by now.**

**This chapter switches between Canada and Russia a few times. Shouldn't be difficult to tell. Kolkolkol.**

**After about 20 mins of working on this, I feel like this chapter isn't as good as I wanted it to be. **

* * *

Canada closes the door behind him and sets Kuma-whatever down. Then he walks over to his bed and lays down on it sideways to watch his bear. Kuma walks over to his corner of the room and lies down for a nap.

Within a minute he is fast asleep. Canada sighs and puts his face into his pillow. He then proceeds to think about the evenst that just occured.

The first thing that comes to mind is the burger attack on England. He glances over at Kuma and wonders the bear had licked his neck because there was still some foor there. Of all the things Alfred has done to the smaller nation, that had to have been the stupidest. Not only was the outcome obvious and inevitable enough for him to forsee, but it was something that even Al wouldn't do.

The second thing that comes his to mind was when England had called him back into the living room later. England said that America had said bad things about his hockey team and maple syrup and Kuma-whatever. Normally, Canada wouldn't believe that his brother would say mean stuff to him, but he was often annoyed with him about the little things. However what made him mad about it more than usual were the words "hockey", "maple", and "bear". Those three things are his most prized and favorite things in the world, apart from his brother (which is at the bottom of that list at the moment). Then he remebers that he had been holding Kuma when the burger incident happened, so therefore Al must have seen him, right?

But the hockey thing is still on his mind since Alfred isn't really a fan of hockey.

The third thing that comes to mind is England's phone call. Why would he call him from the next room? _Because he couldn't see me, _Canada thinks to himself. Even though England was thinking of him when he called, he hadn't remembered his name, or seen him.

But maybe he had seen the fridge open when he came in?

_No he didn't._ _Al didn't see me put something in the fridge. I know he didn't because he didn't know anything was in there._

In his grief and annoyance, Canada fails to remeber the fact that what was in the fridge had been the beers which may have started the whole incident.

But all he remebers are the burgers.

* * *

Still in the living room, Russia stands around looking at everything. He had been in America's house before, but he is always interested in looking around his house because the hyper, childish, and eccentric country always intrigued him. And also Russia is somewhat nosy and pryish when he wants to be.

First he decides to sit on the couch and think about what had happened. Though he makes everyone think he is all-knowing, epic, and scary and stuff, he is still confused as anyone else would be. Even though he was sitting in the corner the whole time, Russia felt even felt more confused than Canada must feel.

It seemed like he had been conjured to the house out of nowhere by England, but in truth he had followed England there that morning and just decided to pop into the house when England had done the strange magic incident. Canada must think that no one saw him do it, but Russia had noticed him take a picture of America in his chibi size. Though no one would ever know how he pulled it off without being noticed, Russia had also taken a picutre of it. _Perfect for blackmail,_ he thinks.

As far as he can determine, England had cast a spell on himself and America, changing him into a younger version of him, then reverted back. Then England had gotten ahold of a 6-pack which America seemed to not have known about, called Canada to make him join his Empire, then America attacked England with a burger which he spit over Canada, then thrown him on the couch.

That is where Russia is confused. At that point, he had decided to chill in the corner and wathc the rest of the show play out. The goings-on between the two seems confusing to Russia, but has a feeling that he detected sympathetic, compassionate or even...caring?... feelings. He isn't an expert on love like France is, but maybe that's what it was.

"How adorable that the US and the UK are all lovey with each other," he says with a smile. "But just to make sure..."

He takes out his phone and decides to call France just for the hell of it.

* * *

Canada, still in his room, turns his mind to the people involved in the events that had occured.

He thinks about England and his spell. He had been sitting on the living room couch when that had happened. He had hidden behind the couch. England's magic always puts him off-balance. It makes Canada nervous.

And then there was Russia. Canada silenly hopes that he has left by now. Russia is creepy.

Suddenly, his mind turns to some other events that he had overlooked in what he thought might have been a three-hour rant. Alfie _had_ said hello to him when he came home. And had warned him to run. And had tried to keep England away from him.

_Did I just think of him as "Alfie?" _He wonders. He only does that when he felt particualrly loving toward him.

Suddenly Canada becomes super confused. He thinks about the emotions and thoughts going through his mind. In fustration, he bangs his head against his pillow. He then flips over onto his back and quietly yells, "What is wrong with me?"

Despite the volume of it, the noise wakes up Kumajiro. In a sleepy and adorable voice, he mutters, "Who are you?"

"I'm Canada."

* * *

"Ok. Bye now." Russia hangs up on France slightly abruptly.

The convorsation was succesful and he is sure that England is in love with America a bit and America feels a little loving towards England too. But not much.

Russia looks at a nearby clock and notices the time. He knows that it takes about two hours to get to the nearest airport from here and figures that about half an hour has already passed. He feels bored and decides to stay at America's house untill he returns.

Then he thinks about Canada. All alone in his room with that bear and probably so confused and hurt and maybe even feeling invisible again.

"Kolkolkol," Russia says at the thought. He then decides to not worry about anything at the moment and just poke around the house.

* * *

**This chapter seems kinda confusing and wierd and stuff, I know. I think this is what you people call a "drabble" maybe. But whatever. Things will get better maybe.**

**Just hang in there my friends!**


	4. Stay Awhile?

**Hey I'm BAAAAACKK! And I'm updating cuz I'm bored and I wanna entertain you people some more. So here we are. These next chapters aren't part of the roleplay and are my own. So here is what is going on at the house during the time after america calls Japan. ****It's what happened just after the phone call in the previous chapter with America in it. Just to be safe I'm putting it in present just as I had before. ENJOY!~**

**This chapter is going to be longer than some of the others you've seen, but you can handle the awk- erm... awesomeness, right?**

**This isn't any RussiaxCanada thing just in case anyone wants to think that.**

* * *

Canada is in his room wondering what to do now. Before England had started telling him and Russia stuff that America had supposedly said, he had been in his room as well, just hugging Kumojeri and feeling relieved that his brother had done something about England, but a bit mad that the process had also gotten burger bits on him.

Now he was just sitting there being angry about what Alfred had said (according to England) and wondering why he believed him anyway. At the time his brother had supposedly said those things, he hadn't been in earshot, so he didn't know who to believe.

Still, the whole situation seems wierd and random to Canada. He recalls how England had started using magic and his brother had told him to run. And he had watched the whole scene of the spell thing. He would keep the secret of the fact that he had taken a picture of Alfred as a chibi-person with his phone. And then England found the beers. The beers that Canada had bought.

"Maple, I'm so stupid," he says aloud.

"_Who are you?_" Kumajiro asks him.

_Al _did_ say that England might have been comming over today,_e thinks to himself. _ did I bring those here?_ Maybe America hadn't really said that stuff. Maybe England really was just drunk. Or maybe some of those magic bolts had hit him on the head and none of it really happened.

His train of thought is broken when he hears a crash comming from the living room. He gets up and hugs Kuma-whatever tighter and heads for the other room. When he enters the room, he sees a broken vase on the floor and Russia standing over it.

"Oh hello, Canada," Russia says with a smile on his face. "I think someone broke this vase. Someone should porbably clean this up."

Canada stares at him in shock and wonders what he is still doing there. "What are you doing?"

"I was looking at this picture and then this vase fell. Maybe you should clean it up, da?"

"Why are you still here?" Canada says in a quiet voice. Although he thinks no one knows it, America is slighly afraid of Russia. Canada knows this and sometimes feels the same. This is one of those times.

"Well I would but I have nothing better to do at the moment and this place is nice so maybe I just stay here for a few more hours, da?"

Canada is suprised and wonders what to do now. "Um," he says, his voice still quiet. "Could you maybe leave and come back later when Al returns? I'll clean up the mess so don't worry about it." He brings his bear closer to his face. Kumajiro is looking at Russia with an undeterminable expression (becasue he's a polar bear).

"Oh, no. I want to stay here fro a while and I help you clean up the mess," Russia says with a smile on his face. "Besides, he won't be comming back for a long time."

"What do you mean?"

"Well I know that he is going to hang out with Japan for a long time."

"What do you mean? How do you know that?" Canada asks. _He is Russia so I have no idea how he would know that and I probably shouldn't question it, _he thinks. "And why is he staying with Japan?"

"Oh I just know. And because England made most of Europe mad at America. He's going to hide like the scaredy-cat he is so the world doesn't try to destroy him." Throughout his whole time talking, Russia keeps a childish smiling face and keeps his voice level and calm. Almost happy. "So I'll just stay here with you."

Kumajiro is still staring at Russia. Canada looks down at him and sees where the polar bear's gaze is directed at. He assumes that he is feeling either scared, distrustful, or annoyed feelings toward the large nation, and hugs him tighter. "Um... It's okay," Canada says nerviously and hastily. "You don't need to stay. I can clean up the mess myself and I can take care of myself here alone just fine! Hehe."

"No I think it will be better if I stay here. Either way I'm pretty sure you can't make me leave. Your brother couldn't. Besides, why do you want me gone anyway?" He takes a step towards Canada.

Canada takes a step back. "Um..." His eyes dart around the room and he sees the pieces of the broken vase near Russia's feet. "Lemme just clean up now..."

"Oh no it's okay I got it." Russia pulls out a broom from behind his back.

_Where did that broom come from? _Canada wonders, similar to when America wondered where his pipe had come from.

Russia then proceeds to sweep up the broken pieces of the ceramic vase. When he finishes, he pulls out a dustpan, again seemingly from nowhere, and collects the pieces. He then stands up and walks toward the garbage bin in the kitchen, passing a frozen-in-place Canada, and dumps the pieces in a separate bag from the bin. "See all done!" he shouts with a smile.

"Thanks, I guess," Canada murmurs quietly. "Now what are you going to do?"

"Erm... Watch TV maybe?"

"Why do you want to stay here?"

"Becasuse I can and because I feel like it," Russia says as he sits down on the couch and reaches for the remote to turn the TV on. "Besides, what are you going to do about it, Canada?"

Canada is standing in the same position he has been in the whole time. He notices how he's standing and notices he it slouching a little bit and hiding his head mostly behind Kuma-whatever's. "Okay I guess I'll just go back to my room then..."

"Oh don't be silly come and hang out with Russia, da?" Russia stands up, walks over to Canada, and puts an arm around his shoulders.

"Uh!" Canada makes a small sound as he is led over to the couch. _Maple, maple, help please._

Russia's hand accidentally strays over to touch Kuma's fur. Suddenly the small bear becomes more alert and flinches away from the hand with a quiet, inaudable growl.

* * *

**NO ONE HAS REVIEWED YET WAHH! That's ok. But I wanna know what you people think so review and stuff like that. I cant make it better if I dont what I'm doing wrong. So... OK BYE! And I'm thinking of posting another chapter maybe.**


	5. A Crazy Canada Couch Convo

**Hehe... am I going too fast for you? I do seem to post chapters faster than other authors do don't I?**

**So... ya. So far so good. Now I wonder what's gonna happen to Canada. And I also wonder why I made a reference to this chapter a few chapters ago...**

**Sorry for the chapter confusion and order and stuff. We should be good and done as far as the "Meanwhile" scenes go.**

**Now where were we...?**

**Ah, yes.**

* * *

Canada sits on the couch next to Russia. To his annoyance, the TV is on a show he doesn't like. He still feels nervous and somewhat scared, but knows that Russia wouldn't hurt him and has no reason to...

Right?

He turns slightly invisible even though Russia knows he's there anyway. He hugs Kuma-whatever tighter and pets him for comfort.

"Ah," he says so quietly only Canada hears him.

"Sorry, Kumi." Canada loosens his embrace a bit.

"Who are you?"

_Sigh._ This familiar line of conversation between the two of them feels comforting. He almost forgets that Russia is there.

"No, not you."

Almost.

"Huh?" Canada looks around and remebers Russia. "Oh him?"

Kuma nods in response.

"Hm?" Russia says. "Oh your little bear thing wants to know about big Russia, da?" He turns to the little bear that Canada is holding.

"Who are you?" he asks again.

"I'm Russia," he says. Then he turns to Canada. "Your polar bear sure is forgetful. Wait. Is he forgetful or just stupid?"

Canada gasps and stands up abrubly, looking hurt. He becomes more visible than ever. The kind of visible that happens when he is upsed or sad. "You take that back! He isn't stupid, he's just forgetful with names."

"Well I'm pretty sure a pet shouldn't forget his owner's name as often as him. And he asked my name when I had said it literally five seconds before." As he says this, he is still sitting on the couch calmly as it they are discussing the show that was on (which is really a commercial but Russia likes the commercials, too).

Thinking of a response, Canada hastily says, "He didn't ask your name, Kuma asked who you were."

"And that's different? Does not seem like it."

"Sh-shut up..." Canada shouts. But he does it quietly like usual.

"Oh, calm down now. Russia is sorry for hurting the little bear's feelings." As Russia had noticed, Kumajiro had kept a hurt and annoyed expression on his face during the whole convorsation. He still wears this expression. "Cheer up now."

"Hm."

"He looks so cute. I love bears."

Kuma's expression changes to one of slight anger and confusion, but no longer hurt.

"Can I pet him?"

"Rawr."

"Um... Why?"

"Because he's cute and I want to pet him. Is that wrong?"

Canada turns away from him slighly.

"Calm down. I won't hurt him."

Canada holds his stance for a few seconds before considering. Then he turns toward Russia again. "You promise you won't hurt him?"

"I promise." Russia holds out his hand.

Kuma shakes his head a bit, but Canada doesn't notice. He walks closer to Russia and holds the polar bear out a bit, but still keeps a grip on him. Russia gently pets the little bear. Kuma's facial expression changes to one of annoyance and anger. And also boredom.

"Aw so soft." Kuma winces a bit under his hand. He isn't being hurt, but rather seems like he doesn't like Russia.

"Okay thats's enough." Canada pulls him away gently. Kuma calms down a bit and becomes more relaxed.

The two countries stare at each other for about a minute before one of them breaks the silence.

"Well you don't have to stand there all day. Come and sit back down."

Canada becomes slightly more trusting with Russia after having gotten Kuma-whatever back without him being hurt. He decides to sit down next to Russia and thankfully, the show had changed after the commercial break to one he liked a bit more. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all. Or maybe Russia is just behaving because he doesn't want trouble with Alfred when he gets home. _If he gets home anytime soon._ Canada decides not to jinx it and just focuses on the screen.

He doesn't notice Kuma's expression changing to one of annoyance, boredom, and mistrust.

* * *

Five minutes later... (just to set the timing mood)

* * *

"So, Canada."

"Hm?" Canada looks away from the TV and at Russia. "Yeah?"

"You had lot of guts back there."

"With Kumajari?"

"No," Russia laughs. _He can't even remeber his own bear's name either. They both must be so perfect for each other like that. _"I mean with England earlier."

"What?" Canada asks confusedly. "Uh... Well I don't really think I was the brave one. It was Al who got him to leave me alone not me so..."

"Yes, but before that. You talked with him on the phone so calmly and stuff. And you stood up to him verbally." _Untill he realized you were in the next room, that is. _"And you watched the whole scene with him and his stupic magic trick. Pretty brave of you."

"Um...Thanks I guess." Neither of them notices the other touching his hand to the pocket that holds their cellphone. Then he remebers the stuff that England had said to his brother about Russia. Canada shuders slightly and unnoticably.

Or maybe not because Russia then comments, "And even though he made me seem like some big scary guy, here you are."

Canada realizes that Russia's words are true and begins to feel a bit of happiness at the fact that someone was complimenting him and noticing him for something he did. "Wow thanks, Russia."

"Tell Canada, what is the most daring thing you have ever done?"

Canada is taken by suprise a bit by the question and stares at some random item while he thinks about it. His gaze reaches the televison screen which is off for some reason. He thinks back for a few moments before answering.

"Well I guess it would have to be playing a game of hockey with a broken leg while carrying Kumi on my back because he was sick," he says with a bit of pride. _Or maybe it was when I played baseball with Al._ But he doesn't think about that much.

"Wow seriously?" Russia asks trying to fake admiration. But he only half fakes it. The other half is legitimate.

"Yeah," Canada says while blushing. He gives Kuma, who was half asleep, a quick squeeze.

Like before, he wakes up and sleepily asks, "Who are you?"

"I'm Canada, silly."

Russia looks at Canada with a sly grin on his face, but Canada doesnt notice it. "It was pretty daring to refuse rejoining Enlgand's stupid old empire. How would you like to try something a bit more daring?"

Canada's small smile fades into a small frown of confusion. "Huh? Like what?"

"Become one with Mother Russia."

* * *

**Chapter end.**

**Nice and abrupt, da? Perfect for keeping you people in suspense mwahaha!  
Anyway I was up until about 11:30 typing this chapter yesterday and I had only gotten up to the part where Canada sits back down I finished this one in about 1/2 an hour and that is how fast they will still be coming probably. **

**But not for today. Cuz Imma be - WHAT? *QUICKLY DELETES*  
*****hopes no one checks her profile*  
Erm...**

**(`_`)**

**('_'(**

**)'_')**

**('_')**

**So where were we?**

**Ah, yes...**

**CLIFFHANGER! DUN**** DUN _DUUUUUUUUNNNNN_!**


	6. Bitten By A Bear

**OMGGGG! WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN NOOOOOWWW? Anyway...**

**As a note to a reference from the Author's Note from chapter 7, when I said "another epidode", I meant a sequel or another story called The AmeriBurger Chronicles 2, not another chapter. This story isnt done yet, and I don't know if I should go back to America's shenanigins in this or the next story. Let me know, ok? Cuz I need to know if we should say what happens then.**

**BUUUUUUTTT.  
EN-EE-WAYYYYYUH! **

**So let's go back to the two house-dwellers now shall we?**

**And the word of the chapter is...**

**NERVOUS!**

**And don't worry, Kuma will get his scree- erm... page time.**

* * *

Canada sits there looking at Russia in disbelief. He wonders how he should react. His first response is to laugh.

Nervously.

"Haha. That's a good one, Russia."

"Haha," Russia laughs back. "I was being serious."

Canada stops laughing and looks at Russia with a shocked and nervous look. "Um... What?"

"Become with Russia, Canada." He puts a hand on the other country's shoulder. Canada flinches at the touch. "Come on. It'll be great."

Canada sudenly becomes fearful again and stands up abruptly. "Um... No thank you, Russia. I'd rather not. Thanks for the offer though." he is slowly backing away towards the hallway leading to his room. "I should probably be going now." He hopes that Russia hasn't noticed his movement.

But he has.

"Don't be silly. Why not? It will be fun, I promise." Russia also gets up and walks toward Canada.

In a paniced attempt to escape some more, Canada quickly turns around and tries to run away.

Russia is faster thatn Canada, however, and catches up to him. He puts his hand on his shoulder. "Why are you running from me? I thought we were pals."

Canada freezes in place for a second and then resumes his attemt to move. But Russia's hand is suprisingly stronger than Canada's whole body and he walks in place.

"It's okay I don't mind I'm quite tired do you mind letting go of me I really want to go to bed now it's getting late you can just stay here on the couch or go home I'm fine by myself it's fine really," Canada rambles nerviously.

With his hand alone, Russia manages to turn Canada around to face him. He looks at the his face and sees someone who has a terrified and nervous expression and a lying smile on his face.

"Kumi is really tired too," he says and hides behing the small bear's face. "So can I please leave now please?"

Kuma has the same angry and annoyed and distrustfull look on his face that he always has toward Russia.

"Aw, little Kumajiro wants to go to sleep too? How adorable!" Russia smiles and pets the polar bear with his free hand.

Kumajiro growls as Russia continues to pet him. Canada is still hiding behind him and doesn't pay attention.

Suddenly, the polar bear moved his head out from under the hand and opens him mouth.

And then bites him

* * *

**Haha you thought I was gonna end it here didn't you? But no. This chapter is just getting started. hehehe...**

* * *

"Hm?" Russia stops moving his hand and his expression changes from one of smugness to one of slight confusion. However he doesn't seem hurt by the bear's bite. "Oh Canada. Little Kumajiro is biting my hand."

"Huh?" Canada looks up and sees that Russia's hand was in his bear's mouth.

His first instict is to scold him but then he remebers that it is_ Russia's_ hand that was being bitten. He doesn't say anything.

"Canada I think he is actually digging into my skin. Could you call him off?"

"Why?"

"Well I would do it myself but I don't want to make a mess."

"WHA~?"

"I mean I don't want to hurt him or you so I am sure we would both rather have him let go than me make him, da?"

Canada looks at Russia and sees the innocent and cheerful smile turn into one that is alot more threatening but alot less innocent.

"Um...K-k-kumajiro? C-could you let go of the man p-p-please?" He studders.

Kuma is suprised by the fact that Canada has said full name correctly. And by the fact that he remebers Canada's name as well. He loosens his jaws and stops biting Russia. Russia feels the preassure lighten up and removes his hand.

"Ah that is more like it," he says, feeling relieved. His hand is bleeding and teeth marks are visible. He holds his hand and stares at the blood comming from the wounds.

Having been released from Russia's grip as well, Canada's fear turns into anger. Mostly at Russia. Slightly at Kuma-whatever. "I told you not to bite people." _Not unless I tell you, remember?_ "I'm going back to my room now," he says in an angered tone.

"Hey, Canada! Why would you leave me here?"

"What now?"

"My hand is bleeding. I am your guest, no?" He holds up his hand. "You help me wrap this up? Where is your first aid kit?"

Canada turns around to look at him. Then he realizes that he probably should do something about his bleeding hand. His expression lightens up. "Fine, then. Come with me."

He first heads to the kitchen and puts Kumajiro in the sink. "_Wash the blood off your mouth_." He mutters. He then walks to the hallway bathroom with Russia following close behind.

A little _too_ close.

* * *

In the kitchen sink, Kumajiro washes his face with a rag and cold water, like the adorable talking bear he is.

When his fur is no longer tinted red, he looks into the shiny sink faucet and does what could only be described as smiling at it. Though he has cleaned the outside of his mouth, he still has some blood on his teeth.

With a small pink tounge, he licks it all away. He both likes and hates the taste.

_Screw you, Russia_, he thinks to himself.

* * *

**Anyone else wanna know what the heck is going on between the little*winks* bear and the huge Russian?  
****Me too.  
****See ya next chapter!**

**And does anyone wonder what happened to that fallen plate of burgers that was mentioned a few chapters ago?  
****What do you think will happen to it? Because I don't know teeheehee!**

**Also as for the Japan and America thing I can either arrange another RP with TTFF or I could just do it myself but she knows more world and history stuff than me so it might be easier with her doing 1/2 the work again.**

**But whatever.**

**OK NOW BYEEEEE~!**


	7. The Rage of K Part 1

**Sorry about the long wait. I actually had this and maybe the next one planned out already but didn't update it recently because I didn't feel like it. Now I feel like it. Here you go!  
Do you wonder why I said "little*wink***** polar bear" instead of just "little polar bear" in the last chapter?  
Hehehe...  
Read on and you will find out!  
Also Japan 'appears' in this chapter so forgive me for the r/l fails cuz I wasn't sure when I should switch them and stuff because I know he doesn't switch it up all the time.  
Anyway ENJOY~!**

* * *

Canada is in the hallway bathroom with Russia, cleaning and wraping his hand.

"Thank you, Canada. You are a good nurse, da?"

"Um...thanks...I guess..." Canada is relieved that Russia's hand isn't _too _hurt and is certain that he wont get an infection. But he is still a little irritated and fearful, but feels slightly confident that Russia won't mess with him anymore for the rest of today. Hopefully. "Sorry about Kuma." _Not really_. "He doesn't usually do that. Hope that it heals up fast." _But if it's a scar, maybe he will be reminded of this when he sees me. If he remebers or sees me again, that is._

"Tell your little bear that Russia is sorry for bothering him."

"Okay I will..."

"But first, I want to hear him apologize, too." _At least he let go before I had to do something about it_.

"Oh, um... Of course, sure." Canada puts away the first aid kit and exits the bathroom with Russia.

When they exit the halway, Russia heads for the couch again. Canada heads for the kitchen.

When he enters the kitchen, the first thing he notices is that Kuma has finnished cleaning all of Russia's blood off and looks like he wants to take a nap in the sink again. Canada walks over to him and picks him up. "Come on, Kumi. Let's go sit back down, okay?"

Kuma wonders exactly where they are going to sit. Then he sees that they are heading towards the living room again and Russia is sitting on the couch again. He then becomes irritated again. He squirms a little in Canada's arms.

Canada is a little suprised because Kumi is always comfortable with him and doesn't usually squrim like that for no reason. He can't think of any reason why he would be doing so now. He dismisses the idea for a minute and continues walking.

When they reach the spot where Russia is sitting, he looks up at them.

"Kuma," Canada says. "Russia has something to say to you." He looks expectantly at Russia.

Russia looks at Kuma with an apologetic expression that may or may not be faked. "Ok then. Kumajiro I am sorry for making you mad at me, okay?" He looks at Canada. "Your turn!"

"Okay." Canada sets Kuma down on the arm of the couch closest to Russia. The two look at each other. "Kuma," Canada says, lightly nudging his arm. "What do you have to say to Russia?"

Kuma looks behind him into his owners face with faked expression of confussion. "Huh?"

"Apologize!" Canada doesn't seem to notice that the confusion is faked.

"Hm." Kuma looks irritatedly at Russia again. Then he puts on a neutral face. "I'm sorry, Russia." _Not really_.

Russia smiles. "Ah, that's better. Now we are friends again?"

"No." Kuma says plainly.

"Kuma...!" Canada exclaims. Then, he finally seems to pick up on the mood of the situation. _Does Kumijiro have a grudge or something against Russia? Does he have something against him? Or is he just mad that Russia bothered me earlier?_

He flashes back to one of the meetings with the other countries. Suprisingly, it was on a day when Canada was more visible to others than usual. Russia, instead of sitting _on_ him, had sat _next_ to him. That day, he had decided to bring Kuma along with him. He remebers that Russia had pat Kuma on the head several times, similar to the way he had seen Russia pet China's panda once or twice, and Kuma had winced a bit. It only happened once, but maybe it had left an impression on the little polar bear. _Surely that doesn't mean Kuma has a grudge, right? Not for something like that?_

Back in the present, Kuma jumps off of the arm of the couch Russia is on and walks over to the other couch. He jumps up on this couch and settles down in a stance that Canada recognizes as his "I'm-not-going-to-move-from-here-until-I-feel-like-it" attitude.

It was rarely shown with him because the two are so comfortable with each other. Usually, Kuma is carefree with where Canada takes him. But this whole time, ever since they had sat down to watch TV, the little white bear had seemed a little uncomfortable and tense. Canada finally notices this and realizes that Kumajiro must either really not trust Russia or doesn't like him for some reason. But he still can't figure out why. Besides the obvious fact that Russia had terrified and bothered him earlier.

_Maybe I'm just overthinking this whole thing_, Canada thinks. _It's probably just a little nothing and Kuma-whatever will get over it by the end of the day. I hope._

* * *

"So now what do you want to do?" Russia says, snaping Canada out of his daze.

"Huh? Wha-? Oh, um... I don't know." He feels awkward just standing there. He decides to move finally and sits down next to Kuma on the other couch. He pets him gently.

Within a minute, Kuma decides to stop glaring at Russia and falls asleep while Canada is still petting him.

Russia notices he has fallen asleep. He then looks at Canada and says, "Canada I think your little bear doesn't like me. Have you noticed that?"

"Well, umm..." _So Russia has already noticed this before me? Has it been obvious or something? Was I being unobservant? Or was Kuma hiding it from me? Or maybe I wasn't able to tell earlier because he wasn't facing me most of the time. Why is this more of an issue than it needs to be?_

"Hello? Earth to Canada!" Russia's voice snaps him back to attention again. He looks over at Kuma and sees that he is still sleeping. "Oh, um, what?"

"You have noticed, right? That Kumajiro doesn't like or trust me?" He has a seemingly smug-looking smile on his face.

"Well I _guess_ he is probably mad at you for, um, earlier." He continues to subconciously pet him. "And that was a little crazy what he did. I assure you he doesn't do that normally," he says, whispering the word 'normally'.

"I heard that. What you have him trained as a little attack bear or something? Like a personal guard pet?" Russia swivels around and lays down on the couch, his feet sticking off the edge on one arm closer to Canada and his head resting on his hands on the other. He looks up at Canada. "It's ok. I am not insulted or anything, it is only a pet's natural reaction to a threat to its owner." He smirks. "But I don't know why you would see me as a threat." _Kolkolkol_.

"Uh..." _How do I even respond to that?_ "Erm... I... don't know... either?" Canada says confusedly. "So um... now what?"

"Haha... I asked you first, remember?"

"Oh, right." He remebers. "Um... I guess we could just..." He wonders what he should make Russia do to keep him busy and leave him alone for a while.

Alfed still isn't back, which is weird. Canada knows how long it takes to get to the nearest airport, so he should have gotten back by now. It is getting late and Canada is begining to think that Russia might have been right about the whole visiting Japan thing. However he knows it, he might possibly be right. Of course, he could have just inferred about what might happen and thought of some random person to mention, rather than knowing exactly what is going on. But still... The situation seems credible enough.

Canada decides to verify...

"I think I'll be right back," he says. "I'm going to go to my room for a while."

"What for?"

"Just something."

"What for," Russia repeats.

_Sigh_. "To use the phone."

"There is one right here." Russia points to the table behind his head.

_Maple, he noticed._ "Uh, I'd rather use the one in my room." He quickly heads for the hallway again. He stops a moment to wonder if it is okay to leave Kuma there with Russia alone, but is sure that nothing bad will happen. He heads for his room.

* * *

In his room, Canada feels relieved that he was able to get inside his room in a few hours since Russia started bothering him. He feels safer and secure. But he doesn't forget why he came here. He picks up the phone near his bed and takes out his cell phone to get the number. After dialling, the phone rings on the other line.

After about two seconds, someone picks up. "Herro?"

"Japan? Hey it's me, Canada." _Please remember, please remember, please remember._

"Cana- Oh hi Canada. Did you need something from me?"

"Uh, yes. I was wondering, um, if America is planning to stay with you for a while. He went to drop England up at the airport a while ago and he hasn't returned."

"Why wourd you assume he is here?"

"Well, um, you are his friend and..." He decides not to mention the fact that Russia is here and told him. "I just figured you would be the first person he would visit without telling me. So is he or not?"

"It is a coincidence you carred about that. You see, he carred me from the airport a few houls ago about staying with me for a few years. I know he is joking, but I do wondel how rong he prans to stay here. Appalentry, Igirisu sent 'harf of Europe aftel him'. And you are mad at him for some leason?"

_So Al told him a bit of what happened here?_ "Uh, well I don't really feel like talking about it right now. Um... when he gets there, c-can you tell him that I called and I'm not mad at him anymore."

"Of coulse I will."

"Also tell him I _am_ mad at his fat American ass for going to visit someone without telling me first. Oh, maple!" _Oh holy maple! Did I really say that out loud?_

"Erm... do learry want me to terr him that?"

"Oh no! Um, I didn't mean to say that out loud I'm sorry! Don't tell him that. Just tell him that... I'm not mad at him and to call me when he gets there."

"Oh, sure. Anyway I hope you have a good evening, Canada."

"You too, Japan. Good bye now."

"Bye." Japan and Canada hang up at the same time.

"Dammit, Alfred! Why did you just leave without telling me! Now Russia is here for no reason and I am stuck with him making a mess of stuff!" Canada quietly vents out loud. _Oh well no use worrying about that now. I might as well just check up on Kumajigy and Russia. I hope both of them and the house are still in one piece..._

* * *

**Speaking of which...**

**Meanwhile...**

* * *

Russia looks over at the small polar bear. He is so CUTE~! Even though the damn thing bit him, it doesn't change the fact that Russia thinks he is so soft and cute. He really wants to pet him again. Also Russia likes his bravery, even though it seems like he is usually passive and forgetful.

Smart bear.

Such a freaking smart bear.

The whole incident reminds Russia of the time that Russia had to call Canada about a bear.

This random polar bear had walked into the room. It went up to him and began gently knawing on his head. It was a full-sized polar bear, not a baby like Kumajiro is. Somehow, Russia had managed to walk over to the phone, with the bear still knawing on him, and call Canada.

_"Canada, do you know how to get a polar bear to stop knawing on your head?"_

_"Why yes I _do _need to know right now."_

Ah, memories...

Yeah, he suposes that Canada is kinda cute too. The way he gets flustered when talking to him is adorable. It is kind of like the way Italy acts when he is talking to him as well. In fact, Russia thinks that the flusteriness people who talk to him have is adorable. Like shyness... but cuter and more fearful.

"Oh, how did I get here?" Somehow, Russia had switched couches and is now lightly petting Kumajiro. "Oh well. Polar bear... Reminds me of snow. Of course it does. Polar bears live in the snow, don't they, little Kuma?"

At the sound of Russia's voice, Kuma wakes up. Groggily, he says, "Who are you?"

"I am Russia, your friend!"

"HUH?" Not hearing 'I'm Canada, your owner' suprises him fully awake. He shoots up and looks up at Russia. When their eyes meet, Kuma rapidly retreats a foot away from him. Then he looks at him with a stare of anger. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I don't really know. I was remebering the past, and then suddenly I was next to you." _How adorable; I am having a conversation with a talking polar bear. He _is_ really cute._ "I hope you don't mind."

"Well I _do_," Kuma says. "Leave me alone. Why don't you just go home already?"

"Because I don't really feel like it. Besides, I like this place. I like hanging out with you and Canada."

Of course, Kuma will always be Kuma. Cue adorable face. "Who?"

"Canada, your owner."

"Oh." Exit adorable face. "Well just leave us alone already! You're just taking up space and making things annoying for us."

"Aw. How do you plan on making me leave, huh?"

Kuma got a little more irritated. This conversation was following the same general path that Russia's conversation with Canada had gone. Good thing Canada is in his room right now apparently...

"Again, I don't know why you both don't want me here. Russia can be fun. You just haven't spent enought time with me. That is okay, since America will be gone for a few days, I will just be keeping you both company. What is wrong with th-"

This whole time, for a reason we may never know, Kumajiro has been growing more and more irritated by Russia's presence. Suddenly, he had had enough of Russia invading in their house like he was the boss of everything.

Russia had been shrugging while saying this, and had his hand near Kuma's face.

It doesn't take a genius to understand what happens next...

* * *

Canada walks into the living room and

* * *

**HAHA FREAKING EPIC CLIFFHANGER! No that wasn't a typo to not finish the sentance. It was intentional. hehehe...  
So I think it is time to merge the Chronicle A with the Chronicle 1 again, da? But there is still some more to Canada and Russia's troubles hehehe.  
So ****I guess we can wait another chapter.  
And maybe we can also go back to a certian items that seem to have been forgotten when we get there.  
Something on a tray maybe...?  
Anyway see yalls next chapter and stuff ok BYE~!**


	8. The Rage of K Part 2: Magic Bear?

**LOLOLOLOL  
****[I edited this chapter for you all. You're welcome. Also I did it to get it back on the map (by that i mean make people see it again)]  
I'm _BAAAAAAAAAACK_~!  
Srry about the long time to update. I had been thinking about other stuff. And (yes, I shall confess) I was distracted by Yu-Gi-Oh. OH THE HORROR! *CRIES* But it's ok. Don't worry about it.  
Anyway, this is where stuff gets weird and freaky. Hence the chapter title.  
This is a direct continuation from the last chapter, so if you want to know how the sentence starts or you forgot, then go back for a sec and read it.  
Okay!  
So let's cut the chit-chat and get right into it!  
ENJOY~!**

* * *

stops dead in his tracks. He becomes frozen with a mixture of fear, shock, and disbelief. He wonders if he should've taken more cover when Alfred told him to run from England's magic earlier.

Because Kumajiro is biting Russia's other hand,

And is half the size of a full-grown polar bear.

Canada looks between the two frantically, becoming more and more invisible out of fear and confusion.

Kuma's face shows an emotion that is a mixture of fury, ferocity, hatred. This scares Canada, who has never seen Kuma at that size, for an obvious reason (which is that it isn't really possible to happen), or seen him display anywhere close to this level of aggression. Canada had dealt with worse threats than a bear, or course. But this was Kuma. _His_ Kuma. Sweet little, lazy, sleepy, quiet, forgetful, maple-loving Kumajiro. Not some ferocious polar bear.

And Russia's face shows an expression of confusion, surprise (not shock), and...

_Did I see that correctly?_

Yes, he did.

_Slight_ fear.

In truth, Russia is faking it to see what would happen, but Canada doesn't know that.

Canada is even more shocked that Russia of all people was showing fear, even a miniscule amount of it, on his face. Not only that, but it was _detectable_.

The world had truly gone mad, now.

He wants to do something, but something holds him back and just watches in terror.

Suddenly, Russia's expression changes to one of anger and shock. "Kumajiro! What do you think you are doing?! Let go of me!"

"I'm pretty sure I'm dropping a hint." Cue more Canadian shock. Kuma's voice had deepened a bit. Almost like he went from a baby to a teen in five seconds. "You're smart enough to realize that you're not really wanted here. You're bothering both of us. Just go away!"

"Okay now little polar bear, I didn't want to hurt you because you are so cute. And because I actually liked you and thought we could be pals. But now I see that's not going to happen, is it?"

"Damn right it's not."

"So let go of me now."

"_Make_ me."

"You don't want me to do that. You know very well that I am stronger than you. Even if you are a polar bear, I could seriously kill you if I want to. I don't want to because it would break poor Canada's heart and also leave a mess in the house. Not something even I want happening. So be smart and get off me now before I make you."

This whole time, the mood of the room had been changing from angry and hateful to dangerous and deadly.

Canada knows how strong a polar bear can be. Even though Kuma is Kuma, he is still a polar bear. And Russia is strong and deadly as well. If they started fighting...

Canada doesn't want to think about it.

"Go ahead. TRY ME!" Kumajiro snarls, Russia's hand still clenched between his teeth.

"One..."

Kuma puts his paw out towards Russia' claws bared.

Canada takes a step back, the only movement he had made the whole time he has been standing there.

"Two..."

Kuma holds his stance. Russia seems to pull out his pipe from behind his back out of nowhere with his free hand.

Canada's mind is going a mile a minute trying to process everything and figure out what he should do, if anything.

"Three!"

* * *

**Like the cliffhanger again?  
****Mwahahahahaa SUSPENSE!  
Anyway, this was a short chapter for the sole purpose of making you people on the edge of your seats for nothing. Also so you would be compelled to read the next one! Nyehehe IM SO EVIL MWAHAHA!  
Nah don't worry I'm just messin' wit u!  
But seriously,  
See you next chapter!  
BYEEEEEE~!**


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